There is so much I want to do!

There is so much I want to do that I sometimes wonder if I will ever be able to do it all, or even a little. Then I begin to feel the feeling deep in my heart and my gut that I can, and already AM doing SOMETHING... surely that counts for something! Even if I cannot do ALL that I want to, I must keep doing SOME of it- everyday, day after day. And the drops will form a downpour- and the oceans can only be formed by several drops seen together.

So I must see what is it that drives the inner engine each day?
What makes me glad to be alive everyday?
What makes me want to wake up each morning?

I do not want to make earth shattering changes...
I want to make people happy, and I want to make people believe in their own force- to heal themselves, to heal their families and their friends.

I want to make Math and English as fascinating in schools as I find them at 42, I want to be able to make it possible for children to THINK and come up with solutions, to feel each problem as a fascinating challenge that is an opportunity for growth.

 I want to make each person I see, or talk to feel that they are supremely powerful and believe they can make a difference.

 I want to start a movement that can spread from one to two to two each to four each and grow in a viral manner- and take over the minds of people in my country and in the world that it is basically a Happy and young place.

I want to make people believe that nice is great and important can be nice.

I want to make it possible for people to identify what is really important in their lives BEFORE it is too late to appreciate it.

I want people to feel love and find their roses in their own gardens, as well as accept the thorns that must be handled with care.

I want to see the world a brighter happier place with smileys, LARGE yellow ones, in nooks and crannies that we often do not wander into, but could simply stumble upon. I want to see the world a more quiet, noise free place where people can respect each other for what and who they are.

I want to do all of that and then some more...

I want to inspire and be inspired and I want the globe to be a lighted inspired community...

I want people to be friends and have an attitude of gratitude.

I want- also- that when one feels the pain, they be allowed to cry... that they be nurtured and told it is OK! That the sun does rise again- irrespective.

Utopian? Romantic? Dreamy?
Possibly...
But it is a lot of things to do in a very short time. And thank God for that!! My life is so busy, I do not have the time to be really sad or angry for too long. My life is so full that I do not have much space for too much hurt or resentment for very long either.

Don't get me wrong!

I do have my pains and my moments of utter despair.

I do have my days of having gotten up from the wrong side of the bed.

I, too have my feelings of intense anger- even wanting to smash someone's nose! (And I am an ENT Surgeon!! So may be I can fix that!) And I know THAT can be a punishable offence! SO good sense soon takes over.

The point is, through all of it- the moments of anger, despair, pain, sadness are momentary and short lived. The overall complexion of my life is THANK GOD!

Thank God for the wonderful man I have for a husband who I am still madly in love with after nearly twenty five years of knowing him.

Thank God for the parents who gave me the strength and the gumption to stand out in a crowd and not feel like a sore thumb and taught me I could do ANYTHING I decided to.

Thank God, for the lovely children who love me, who drive me crazy and who make me go in circles, both in amusement and in sheer desperation.

Thank God for my friends who accept me in all my moods- warts and all- and love me MOST of the days.

Thank God for a wonderful place to work where people love me and allow me to make a difference each day. And even when they do not love me like I want to be loved they compel me to do better each day!

Thank God for each breath I take because it opens up new mysteries and throws new things to do or see in the world around me.

Thank God!

If there is one thing- only one thing I would be able to leave behind when I depart, it is for my children, my friends and everybody else who has known me to have this attitude of being glad to be alive and ready to live the mystery with love and abandonment, with honesty and sincerity and with the wonder that this life truly deserves.

And a feeling that THEY- each of them, can make a difference.

words...

I am and always have been fascinted by the written word. I write- and I speak with passion about the things I want to change, about the things I want my children and their friends to experience.

And because I thought they were missing the magic of the language, I started a Book Club with my children and their friends. We read and we explored and we laughed and we cried. We also were spell-bound many a time at the profundity or the stupidity or even the depth or the shallowness of what we encountered. But we always, always, always had fun.

We were always inspired to pick up one more star-fish... and catch just one more star... and gather just a little bit more of the stardust we could feel floating around us but could not see.

We needed to open our eyes as well as keep our hands outstretched to catch the light beams that were bouncing back and forth, lighting up our world. We knew there could be darkness and there would be despair and there could be fear, but we also knew that the only way out was to have the little voice and the little light ready. One tiny pin can shatter the silence. One minute beam can wipe out the darkness.

And that is all it takes.

We MAY have all the pain that the body can bear just as easily as we CAN have all the blessings we want. The eyes AND the heart, and the hands- all need to be open to receive. And we WILL have to let go of the past that sits in the tea cup of life- running cold to be able to gather some warm tea that can comfort our insides.

How many people can I reach? May be not many.

How many hurts can I wipe out? May be not many.

How many star fish can I save? May be not many.

But each person that I can touch, each urt that I can wipe out, and each star fish that I save will be that one step closer to the kind of world I can imagine possible.

And if I can think it- I can do it.

So can you... and you... and you...

Someone told me that what they were doing was just a drop in the ocean. Just a drop? I exclaimed? JUST A DROP? It is THE drop(s) that make the ocean!!

The signs are everywhere!

The rosary broke!

It was simply held in the hand. The right one, the dominant hand held the rosary in a gentle loose grip in the palm. There was no stretch on the string. The beads had been freshly strung. The string was strong and thick. It had been in the neck of a saint for some time before reaching the hands that held the beads with deep reverence.

The chant in the morning was for peace on earth.

Entering the doorway, there was a lingering, nagging thought, 'Careful! The rosary might break!'

It had not been caught in anything. There was no physical pull from anywhere. There was, nevertheless a strange feeling of impending doom.

The beads were clear, and crystalline. They brought the world into a sharp focus. You only had to look. The saint had put a lot of energy into this rosary, and a lot of love. This was a shield for the person who now held it. And did not realise it.

Strange are the ways of Almighty. He sends the strong winds that threaten to blow you off the planet; then makes sure there is a powerful force that holds you steadfastly. So strong is this force that it both exposes you to the full fury of the storm, and also shields you from the anger that threatens to burn you to cinders.
This protective shield makes sure you understand that you CAN face anything- even this! It makes sure you realise that God does not give you anything that you cannot face; and that He cares, He keeps giving the life force through unbeknown sources.

This shield has the power Guru's chants gave it. It deflects all that could wilt your fragile heart and subtly directs whatever can strengthen your soul, straight to your heart.

You feel the force, and reeling under the onslaught, you desperately seek a straw to hold on to. You do not realise that to struggle is futile. In fact, if you struggle, you will go under!

Let the wave wash over you. Be carried. God has made sure your guardian angels ALWAYS watch over you.

Look at the event as it happens. As if you are both a part of it, and a mere spectator- watching it from outside.

You may find a few tears brim over. Cry.
You may find your breath stuck for just a fraction of a moment. Hold it.
It is in the flow of the tears that you will lose the pain.
It is in the held breath that you will find eternity.

Sometimes, it is easy to react. And then, you are bound again...
When the storm blows, you could be cancelling the past Karma. Karma is relentless. When you resist and fight the storm, you end up generating fresh Karma that must be neutralised later.

So watch. And difficult as it seems, forgive and let it go. Take help when you feel overwhelmed. Know that God and Guru are always around the corner.

The signs are always there. Help, and shield... is ALWAYS around the corner.
You only have to look.
You only have to hear.  

The long and winding road...

SDhawan7608, originally uploaded by Dr Sanjay Dhawan.

Sometimes all we can do is just take the next step and then the next and then, one more. We can see a dead end approaching. There seems to be no way you could go on. But, you must. And you do.

Then you are glad you did!

It was not just the greens by the side of this road that held you captive and mesmerised on the road. There was something more. And THAT was purpose! The climb is arduoous. The going is tough. And the vision limited. But simply going on gets you past the point where the road seemed to end.

You realise that it only SEEMED to end. The bend is just that- the bend! It is not the end. And the road will go on.

You will take the road and turn right around in the same direction that you came from. Just a tiny fraction of inclination that is different takes you to a totally new destination.

In life it is the small that carries the mystery and the wonder. In life it is the perseverance that bears the fruit. In life you MUST carry on.

And the signs are everywhere. It requires only the keen eye to see and attentive ears to hear.

Often we get lost in the beauty that surrounds us and forget to keep walking. You may stop. Rest. Drink some water from the little stream that splashes in front of you. But... you must go on...

Do you know where you are going?

he walks... alone..., originally uploaded by naturewalker.

There are times when we walk. Aimlessly. Just to keep putting that one foot ahead of the other. Tiredness in our bones and restlessness in our soul- one that makes it impossible to go on and the other that makes it impossible to stop!

And if you do not have that restlessness, you will give up. It is a blessing from the Nature to provide that streak- it might just light up one small, tiny, crevice that opens into the next beautiful valley. It might just push and prod enough for the journey to be continued in spite of the exhaustion. Despite being all alone. To go on.

After all why are we born? What must we do in order for this life to be what it can be? And why must it be anything at all? these are questions many have asked before and will continue to do so in the future. Are we here for a reason?

The physicists are now beginning to believe that we may indeed have hit the Jackpot!

http://www.amazon.com/Cosmic-Jackpot-Universe-Just-Right/dp/0618592261/ref=sr_1_10?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1296759727&sr=1-10

Paul Davies makes a clear case for there being some Grand design at work. He says it is highly unlikely that we had everything going JUST right for the life to take the form it did and not wither away in some ethereal realm of the Universe.

Even the gravity we experience is just right for life to sustain itself. Had it been any less, and we would not have had the medium for life to survive. Had it been any more, we would not have formed!

That everything is JUST right appears no fluke of Nature. That everything obeys certain laws appears no fluke of Nature. That we may or may not acknowledge these laws makes not a bit of difference to these laws!

We will go on- regardless.
We HAVE to!
We CAN and, should try and see where we are headed just so that we reach!

Are you ready to reach? Or will you just go on??

Garden of 5 (non)Senses

Garden of 5 (non)Senses, originally uploaded by Dr Sanjay Dhawan.

कहीं पर पत्थर, कहीं पर झाढ़ , कहीं पर इमारते, कहीं पर ख़ाक और इन सब के ऊपर खुल्ला आसमान. बिलकुल नीला. और एकदम साफ़. सब को समेटता हुआ अम्बर इन पथरीली राहों को कहीं धूप  और कहीं छांव देता है.

ज़िन्दगी तो क्षण- भंगुर है. आज है, कल नहीं. इस छोटी सो ज़िन्दगी में लोग भीड़ में खो से जाते हैं और जब खुद नहीं भी खोते तो अपनों को ढूंढ नहीं पाते!

क्या आज को नज़र अंदाज़ कर, कल पर कदम जमाया जा सकता है? क्या बीते हुए कल के निशाँ अपनी ज़िन्दगी की राह से पूरी तरह मिटाए जा सकते हैं? क्या आने वाला कल इन्ही पथरीली राहों पर चलेगा? या... हुम, तुम, यह, और कोई और भी अपने अहम् को त्याग कर इन पत्थरों में भी फूल खिला सकेंगे?

क्या जीवन इन पत्थरों और काँटों के बिन भी इतना ही सार्थक हो पायेगा?

इन पत्थरों का, इन राहों का, सब का एक महत्त्व है हमारे जीवन में. इन सब को एक समान गले लगाना ही इस जीवन की सब से बड़ी शिक्षा है.

जब चलना ही इन राहों पर तो गिरने से क्या डरना?

In another life

In another life, originally uploaded by Just Jelena Jankovic.

Life is fragile. Fickle. And momentary.

The candle burns away- leaving blobs of wax, and smoke. The light does not outlast the candle. But it can.

One candle may light up one or ten or a hundred or several thousands of other candles. Each of these can then spread the same light. And spread the warmth that defines life.

A happy life is a meaningful life.

A happy life is a life of pleasure and pain, of engagement and of anticipation, of living- and dying each moment.

A happy life is a life of significance. Like the candle...

The energy of the Universe is finite, just as the entropy of the Universe is finite. When one life is extinguished another one sprouts up somewhere else.

The soil toils for the plant that grows and the leaves that fall finally return the elements to the soil that generated it. The life forms do the same at another plane... They are born, they grow and they die- merging finally in the pool that generates another being some place, some time.

Birth and death are simply means of cycling the energy in this vast Universe. We know but a figment of this vast firmament.

We may let out light die away and merge with the elements. Or we may consciously light up several others who feel life is a significant force and indeed make this life a significant force.