It was perhaps in 1995 that I read The Celestine Prophecy. It brought about a significant shift in my thinking about the world and what happens in it.

All human interactions- all interactions- are energy exchange processes. The entire Universe is a source of endless energy that we can tap into each time we quietly allow some to flow in.

But...

Human beings, especially, do not tap into a source that is all around us and can charge us endlessly. We interact with our peers, youngsters and elders in energy exchange interactions... or more appropriately competitions.

There are various types of personalities defined for the purpose of convenient identification. These may be Intimidators, Interrogators, Aloof, and the Poor Me.

Each of us starts out with a set of childhood experiences which arm us ( or disarm us) for all our future interactions. These are more like Control dramas that are played out to capture energy from the interaction. We try to control the energy and usurp a major share. We, however, do this in very personalised styles.

An INTIMIDATOR, classically, are attention seekers in an aggressive manner. They are loud and have outbursts. All those around them are constantly afraid that they may trigger an outburst of anger or even rage. They invoke feeling of fear and anxiety around themselves. They are least resisted by the POOR ME. This closely matched drama is largely passive, and presents a helpless face. The POOR ME constantly says," Do not hurt me! Look what you are doing to me." Poor me's want to make Intimidators feel guilty and stop the surge of energy outflow, thereby keeping their own.

Next is the INTERROGATOR. An Interrogator questions each little activity and breaks down spirit. These people are hostile, passive aggressive or active aggressive. Always critical of each move, they pick faults, can be perfectionist, self-righteous, skeptical. They may be highly intelligent and appear logical. But their fault picking puts everyone around them on guard. They are matched by ALOOFS, who simply guard themselves against intrusive criticisms of interrogators by closing themselves off.

ALOOFS are often caught up in their own internal world of self doubt. They invite others around them to draw them out by behaving in a closed manner. They are not only loners but very lonely... almost begging to be drawn out of their secret shells. They are the ones who wear their being different on their sleeves and use it as a constant argument to justify everything they do. Their constant refrain is that nobody understands them. Aloofs usually match up with Interrogators who would try to draw them out with questions, but they also tend to invoke Intimidators or even Poor Me's because they can potentially respond to any power play by clamming up.

POOR ME is the victim- perpetual and eternal. This one wants sympathy and may occasionally slip into Aloof when they are giving the silent treatment. They are not really looking for solutions but use the problems only as points of conflict that evoke sympathy. Poor me sustain their victim status by partnering with intimidators

These control dramas usually start when the children are trying to gather their required energy from their parents. Intelligent aware parents would help the child learn to tap into nature, couple it with senstive nurture and use the Universe as the universal source of energy. The problems arise when the parents start competing with their own children because they have not given up their individual control dramas. They, then invoke a complementary control drama in their children.

Parents who have risen above the need to compete for energy, then, teach their children how to tap into the universe and teach them that such a competition is, infact, unnecessary. These parents and these children make for peaceful happy noncompeting homes.